Balancing Act

This post will more than likely just serve as therapy for me.  It will be a journal entry of sorts.  I have found that in almost 8 years of ministry one of the hardest things is the follow-up/ check-in for people in your church.  In a church like Grace Fellowship, there are many who say they go to Grace, but after some time you do not see them.  Many of them were consistent attenders for awhile, but have stopped attending for whatever reason.  You have others who are going through a busy season, and just have not been able to attend for whatever reason.  Others who have really left and now attend another church.  No matter the situation, I always find myself in a tough spot.  Some people want to be chased and pursued while others just want to be left alone and even hope you have not noticed they are gone.  I find this balancing act very difficult.  Some want a call, some will never answer that call.  Some want lunch, others want to leave the restaurant if you just happen to bump into them at the same place they are eating.  For some I call.  Others I email or Facebook.  I go to visit some and set up appointments with others.  I really try and engage each person in a way that I think is comfortable, but in that process I never feel like I am getting it quite right.  I feel like I end up bothering some  while others feel like I am ignoring them.  I am going to continue to work hard to find this balance, but I have thought of some things that would help from those people who go absent in a church.

  1. When you are written or called, get back to the people who reach out.  It is incredibly frustrating to pursue people and never hear anything.  I would rather hear go away and leave me alone than silence.
  2. When you do talk to the person from the church reaching out, be honest.  If you have found another church, share that.  If you were wounded by the church and did not know what to do, convey that.  If you have been at travel baseball for two months, share that.  If you are struggling with your beliefs, share that.
  3. Let the church know your boundaries.  If you want pursued or left alone, please share.
  4. Share how the church can pray for you if that is what you need.
  5. Please be careful not to be “one and done” person.  The church serves you for a long time and then this thing happens and you are gone.  Remember the faithfulness of a community.

3 thoughts on “Balancing Act

  1. Maybe silence is the best that person can do at that time. Maybe they are going through something alot harder to bear than your “frustration”. And maybe silence IS their way of saying “leave me alone”.

  2. Hello Kieth,

    You can contact me anytime and anyway you need to. You and the crew at Grace have been their for Myself and Mary at every turn on the road of our Christian walk. As a matter of fact, please feel free to ask more of us. Our schedules are hectic, but we realize we need to do more for our church and the people in it. If we can, we will be there for you as you have been for us. Thank You and the Staff so much for all you do and the sacrifices you all make.

    Please pray that our hearts and minds are able to accept God’s will and that we would lead a more Christian life and be better examples to our friends and aquaintances.

    Brad Corey and Mary Kiger

  3. You and anyone at Grace Fellowship are welcome at my door anytime day or night. I love interacting with other believer’s. It keeps me going and hopefully keeps them going also. I hate missing any Sunday’s but sometimes things happen. I have never heard a message from anyone at Grace Fellowship that didn’t bless my needy heart. I had been without spiritual fellowship for some time and Matt’s finding Grace Fellowship has been a bright spot in my life and I know it has in his also. God Bless You and God Bless Grace Fellowship.

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